I am sitting on my porch.  There is a warm breeze brushing across the sweat on my neck as I smoke my pipe and enjoy a nice glass of pinot noir.  I sit here as I have before, but this time I am alone.  I am alone with my thoughts, my memories and my emotions.  So many great conversations have been held in this place, started right here in this chair. I am overwhelmed as the memories flood my mind.  I see the smiles of my friends, I hear the intention in their voices, I feel the joy of being in their presence.  I miss them.  As I am in this place, I think about memories and what a gift it is to have them.  Right here, on this porch, a buddy challenged me to let others know me the way he does, to stop building walls, to stop controlling what pieces of my heart my friends get and actually offering all of it to them.  I learned a lot that night.  I was moved by that challenge.  I need that memory to keep me moving forward in that knowledge, that realization.  I see my friend sitting across from me, thinking about the love that he desires in life and fearing his complexity may somehow get in the way.  I feel the freedom that is starting to trickle into his heart as he realizes that love is so simple, so available.  I feel the heart of my friend as he sat next to me telling the story of the love of his life, of how he is going to marry her and can’t wait to give his life up for her, to her!  I love it.  I have the chills on this hot night as I write about those beautiful moments.  So many amazing moments.  Like the time my friend sat across from me with a glass of wine in his hand and told me that he is beginning to accept my love for him.  Such a crazy powerful moment to experience together.  Memories.  Memories of feelings, conversations, of eye contact and sincerity, of deep authenticity and expressed hearts.  There is a power in the knitting of our souls as we share moments together.  Those intentional, real conversations are the foundation of the collective memories of our lives lived together.  There is nothing quite like that!  What would we do without the replaying of those intimate moments in our mind.  On this night, I feel my memories sustain me as I miss those I love.  I don’t just feel it, I know it.  It keeps me hopeful for those reunions with my soul friends.  I wait in eager anticipation for the flow of the wine, the rising of the smoke and the ebb and flow, rhythm and rhyme of beautiful conversation.  Memories connect me to the hearts of those who are not here in this moment.  Yet they are!  They are in my heart.  They are in my head.  They are in my soul that aches to sit with them, to feel their presence.  I am walking through my memories tonight.  I am sitting with my friends in my heart.  I am drinking the gift of God in wine as I honor them tonight.  I love you guys.  I miss you.  I look forward to our days on this porch again.  Until then, I hold you in the memories of my heart.  I smoke my pipe as I have with you and let the smoke rise like incense in the sanctuary of this sacred place.  I love you.  I miss you.  Here’s to you and the memories of your beautiful hearts and the gift of calling you my friends!